Sunday, June 9, 2013

Rule # 4- I May Not Act Like A Lady, But You Damn Well Better Treat Me Like One

Hello everyone! Glad to see you're still with me after my last post.

First: I completed the great purge: I deleted all those assholes who fell off the internet once I sent them a picture, the pricks whose first questions involved sex, and everyone with a strange username (among the fallen are User11, KSquare, and Indian Stud). Somehow, due to eHarmony's bizarre we'll-match-you-with-everyone-until-one-sticks policy, there are still 25 survivors. Still communicating with three or four.

Adam: Adam has been eliminated. He texted me approximately 5 hours before the date on Saturday and said that he wasn't feeling good and wanted to cancel. I knew from talking to him for about a week and a half that he seems to not feel good, or do stupid shit that ends with a broken ankle or wrist a lot. Sadly his injuries tended to amount to 1/3 of our conversations. He then proceeded to tell me he was almost out of text messages. Was I on Facebook?

Time Out For Truth: I haven't "friended" any of these guys yet. A- I'm promoting my blog there and I don't want them reading it. B- That's how stalking starts, friends. Don't facebook friend anyone that you're not comfortable with, and sadly- I don't feel comfortable with any of them yet. Especially Adam. That's why my cousin Kris was going to be accompanying us. I'm not dumb enough to travel alone to a city I'm not familiar with and run off with a guy I've never met before. YOU SHOULDN'T BE EITHER.

Back to Adam: At this point I started ignoring his messages. Honestly, I was having an awesome weekend and didn't want to be bothered learning how to stop what was turning into a stage 5 clinger. That's right folks. The texts continued. And then the emails started. At this point I think he finally got it, because he sent a nice simple email: "Do you want to continue communicating? I'm sorry I canceled our date, but I can come up to NYC or something! It's very doable for me."

Clinger Alert: WHAT ABOUT ME NOT RESPONDING TO YOUR TEXTS AND REFUSING TO FRIEND YOU ON FACEBOOK MADE YOU THINK I'D WANT YOU WHERE I LIVE?? SERIOUSLY? Seriously.






I responded back as politely as possible that I thought he was a nice guy but I wasn't feeling any chemistry, that I didn't feel like I couldn't maintain a North Jersey/Philly relationship, and that I'd rather not continue communication.

I actually did meet a guy at Philly Con who had the balls to ask for my number. He had me scribble it on a photo pick-up ticket with his sonic screwdriver pen. (Did I mention he was dressed as 11? *swoon*) Nothing interesting to talk about with him yet though, but it keeps hope alive!

Now to Brandon* (*as a reminder, names have been changed to protect the innocent and the guilty.) who you may remember from a few posts ago asked me out. I've been getting increasingly nervous since I've been interviewing some friends for an upcoming post. I was getting all sorts of scenarios on how this could go terribly wrong.

Brandon:
*5'9"
*32 years old
*Has job, apartment, car
*Passionate about involvement with the freemasons.

He bought the tickets the night before, so I became reasonably confident that he wasn't going to cancel or ditch me. He even showed up early! We met up at the mall and went to Ruby Tuesdays where he paid for everything I wanted. I think he was nervous because he had a funny look in his eyes and he just talked and talked. He's never seen Doctor Who or Supernatural. In his defense, apparently the freemasons meet on Wednesdays. He promised to look into Doctor Who though. Even despite the fact that I know nothing about the freemasons, and he knew nothing about my shows we managed to maintain a pretty good conversation flow.

After that we walked around the mall for a bit until it was time for the movie. (He paid for snacks as well!) We saw Iron Man 3, which for the record- is exactly my idea of a good date movie. I just wish I could stand Gwyneth Paltrow better. I think she's been tainted by all that GOOP nonsense. I just don't like her or her face. Oh well. RDJ and that kid totally made the movie anyway. Brandon proved his merit by not feeling me up in the dark which would have been highly unattractive on a first date without looking like Jensen Ackles.





I'd still hit that any day in my dreams. Danneel is a lucky lucky woman.

He just put his hand on mine for a few parts and we enjoyed the movie. All in all, he treated me like a lady so major points for him.

I know what you're thinking- Ally you went on a date and you said NOTHING about his looks. Good for you! It's not good. My first impression in person was that "Oh god he kinda reminds me of my Dad" feeling. It was horrible. He's overweight like me (and my dad), still slight taller than me though (Bonus! Can't date short guys), and balding. I'm not attracted to him to the point where it makes me sad. I wish I was, you know? He's nice. He likes me. I know he likes me since he asked me out again when we were saying good-bye. I'm going to go out with him again. I'm gonna give it a little time to see if I feel more chemistry. Not to mention I could use the experience. It's been a long time since I've been out and about with a guy. My mom and grandma are overjoyed. I think they were secretly afraid I'm a lesbian (and I blame my uncle wholeheartedly for starting that rude and untrue thought in their heads.) My best friend however, despite the fact that she's a thousand miles away and hasn't seen me in a year knew it right away though.

Sigh. Feeling lonely :( Thanks for sticking with me y'all!


1 comment:

  1. I'm loving your blog, Ally. I could have used this when I started on okcupid a year and a half ago. Everything that you're experiencing is totally normal and it gets better! And easier!

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